How to go round your house girl

Several weeks ago i felt so bad as i watched news featuring a young couple who had lost their baby from  chocking. Around the same time some house help in a country in Africa was caught mixing her menstrual with the baby's food.There have also been incidents of house helps drowning babies and taking off never to be seen again.
This and many other horrifying stories of what house helps have done to the innocent children left in there care. Whenever a house help steals or does something wrong we quickly send them away and on the next day we have another being sent from upcountry to us in the city. The trend goes on without us realising that there is something wrong somewhere that needs to be addressed until one does something to turn our attention to them is when we get so busy as though it is the first time we are getting to see such.
Let us not wait until our house catches fire for us to start removing our belongings from it; let us be wise and instead act before it strikes.
How can we get the situation in control? Before getting to solve what we do not know let us first spot the flaws.
From the beginning when the girl is brought to you and you take her in as your new house help do you really know who she is?You are probably thinking that this is a girl who wants to work for money and is so desperate and would do anything. That is what most of us think.The truth is that this are people with flesh and blood and more so with feelings just like me and you and we tend to forget this.How do we make things work for us while we still get along without any major problems arising?
If it is possible you should be able to know who you are dealing with.This is your house yes,she is your employee and i do not object to that but get to know where she comes from before you get to deal with her. Get to know her background,her  relatives and what type of life she has been living and the environment she has lived in before she got to your house.
This is going to help you a lot as you will know how to address her in case she goes wrong.If she is an orphan you will probably understand why she may be sad at times and not in the mood to do things as usual. If she has been abused in the past you will understand why she may distance herself and be cold despite being in your house. It is thus your duty to help them gain your trust as trust is earned. It is from this that some families have had a family nanny passed on to their children.

The way you address someone would easily tell how you perceive them. It is thus very important to think before you start talking to someone or if it proves hard don't say anything at all. It will not hurt when you say nothing but it will hurt most when you say something without giving it a second thought.Even when it call for some  scolding do it as you would want it to be done to you. Don't hurl insults at  or condemn her as that would only make it worse for your children as you do not know what she may do when you are away. Do not shout at her when asking her to do something;she is not deaf,even the deaf are not shouted at.

when she asks you of something do not answer her back as though she is some intruder, a good answer kisses the lips. Answer her in the same way as you would expect her to. It will even be more easier for you as you will now be communicating.Keep in mind that communication takes place when a message is sent and the message is decoded in the way the sender intended it to be. Let her know what you expect of her ;do not assume she knows everything, even angels get orders and instructions from God.

just how is she to manage this? Can you?

At the end of this do you expect any good results?

When it comes to work give her work that she can be able to do.Do not give her work as though she were some beast of burden.you should also not shower her with duties such that in the end she does not know what to do and what to leave behind. If you give her too much she will either do somethings and leave some or do everything but register some poor performance.

Do some of the house work when you are around so as to set an example, in short show her that you know what you are telling her to do. Do not let her think that she knows more than you do;besides being your employee you should still take control of the situation without being bossy.
Let not what you do with her be restricted to giving orders and taking reports no. Also make it your duty to commend her on the good things she does. Let her feel appreciated but do not overdo it as too much of something has also proved to be poisonous. Give her some gifts according to season thus if it is Christmas season , don't just open gifts as she watches and salivates. Let her feel as part of you.

Lastly let her have her voice in the house since she has become part of you. In case of a misunderstanding between her and any other member of the family, listen to both sides before you make judgment. You should also not impose decisions on her. Do not make her wear over size clothes as though she were your house clown or something. what are you fearing? Does her wearing that erase your fear? It only makes things work for you. When you mistreat her in that kind of way she easily earns sympathy. In any case why would you fear for your husband because of a mere house help?THINK!

Train your children not to look down upon her or make fun of her. She is not paid to be a doll. Let her have the respect she deserves;If you humiliate her in there presence they will try it in your absence and trust me the results will be harsh and cruel. She may do anything that will run into her mind  whether planned or unplanned.

Crying after the milk is spilled doesn't bring the milk back to the glass and neither does wishing make it reality .Let us use our clay before it drys lest we risking throwing it away or having to wet it again.If we take this in consideration and what else we are advised carefully we will have happy children and happy house helps taking care of them and soon we will see them run around.

The happier she is the more happy your baby will be;The harder you make her life the cruel she will be to your baby. All the best.